Tango for Two
by RandomNumbers523156
Summary: Thanks to Rin's malevolent machinations, Len is roped into a dancing reality show. Things only got weirder when he angered Neru while trying to do something different. And Cubi is still not a meme.


**A.N.:** This was written yesterday when Squiggles gave me prompt to write a story (Len enters a dancing reality show), so I ended up liking this story and decided to edit it and publish it.

* * *

Len Kagamine didn't like dancing. It was paradoxical that he was good at dancing. Her sister was to blame for tht: when they were eight, her twin sister Rin challenged him to dance and, since he couldn't turn down a challenge of her sister, he accepted and begged his parents to enroll in the dancing school.

He thought of dropping off after getting bored to the bone after one week, but he couldn't let Rin win. In hindsight, he learned that challenging someone could be an actually efficient way to manipulate a person. He learned that after years listening to his sister's challenges: eating red peppers, stealing Ritsu's missile pads, swapping Hio's cup of coffee with sewer water, and obviously to dance. None of those events gave sweet memories to Len and this was fault of her damn sister. They always complained that he was Len, the Damned, but the true damned one was Rin and her habit to challenge him.

But now, she went too far, _too far_. All those years in the dancing school, the mockery of the other boys, all of them culminated in him getting on live television. "Stars Dancing" was the newest reality show, where poor unfortunate souls danced to the camera and were subject of scathing criticism from an apathetic jury.

The assistant called: it was Len's turn. Cursing his luck and his sister, he entered in the stage. He saw the jury: Neru Akita, a woman more or less his age with a blonde, side ponytail, she looked graceful in a gray dress with yellow highlights, in a definite contrast with her annoyed scowl; the dance pop star Big Al and…a floating black cube? Len didn't even bother to look at the tag, because he knew that it was mortal enemy: Cubi. Actually, Cubi was just the cube that for some reason delivered pictures of frogs (he called them "rare pepes") in an attempt to intimidate him and their fight for "memedom". He always thought Cubi was weird but he could never expect him to be a judge in the show.

"Let me tell you something, Kagameme!" Yohioloid said. Cubi couldn't say anything but the word "Yo!" and Hio was the only one that could understand him. The poor man sounded the person with the most regrettable job in the world, "Reality shows are a cruel parent, but an effective teacher. You can't fight the memes!"

Len just raised an eyebrow. His psychologist said to ignore Cubi or play along when in high-profile events, so he answered, "Alright, it's time to Kagameme," he put on his trilby hat, "To let'er meme!" And he blew a raspberry to Cubi, making him angrily make C++ noises.

He danced the _schuhplatter_. This was his secret weapon because no one could ever expect someone to dance the Germanic folk dance in the show. The dance that Len engaged in involved upbeat hopping, stepping, but it never ceased to be somewhat enlightening and lively. After it ended, the audience remained silent.

"What? Is that it?" Neru said, getting up from her seat. Contrary to all regulations concerning behavior of judges in reality shows and entered  
on the stage. Or better, she stormed on the stage, stomping the floor, her heels seemed more like hammers than anything else.

"Something wrong, judge Neru?" Len said, starting to sweat. He messed up real bad to have the judge invade the stage.

"You have a lot of guts, Len Kagamine," she said, with an angry scowl in her face, while poking his chest, "You come here to MY reality show and dance schuhplatter, thinking we're all a bunch of savages that doesn't know what this is! You are such a special snowflake, huh?" She then picked up the border of her dress and said,

"Maestro, music!" The DJ, Ruko Yokune, nodded and started the music.

"What are you doing?" he asked, scratching the back of his head.

"Challenging you to a duel, of course!" She replied, irritated and making sure of showing that.

"Okay…"

The music started. German fanfare started to play while Len and Neru danced, stomping and hopping and bouncing, the palm of their shoes firmly stomped the ground. One more tenacious than the other. When the music stopped, they breathed to recover their breath. Meanwhile, the audience was divided: half of them chanted "Neru" and the other "Len".

"It looks like it was draw," Len said, smiling awkwardly, "Perhaps, we could call it a day, going our homes happily…"

"Not a chance, idiot!" Neru cut him out. Snapping her fingers, the DJ turned into another song. Len recognized, it was a ballet song. "Let's go for the second round!"

"Oh, boy…" he muttered. The song meant it was a ballet dance for one person. The span and leapt through the stage, one mirroring the other, circling each other and making sure they didn't touch each other. Their gazes clocked with each other, making the mirror effect even more clear and surreal. They were perfect rivals. But this didn't change the outcome. At the end of the song, the result was the same: one part of the crowd with Len and the other with Neru.

"Are we done yet?" Len asked, panting visibly tired.

"No way!" Neru said, equally tired. "It's obvious that the only way to truly show my superiority is to have something we both don't expect." She then turned to Ruko and said, almost crying, "DJ, give your best, unexpected shot!"

Ruko nodded. Then, she picked a key from her breast pocket and opened a red case, containing a red button. The lights glowed in many colors while Latino fanfare started to play.

Len and Neru looked concerned to each other and turned red. It was a tango. Awkwardly, they approached each other. The saying says it takes two to dance tango and there were, dancing with each other.

Tango is an interesting dance, because it needed a pair. It was a tension between both of them fighting for dominance but at the same making efforts to balance each other in a synchrony of steps. Fight-not-fight-fight-not-fight. Struggling for domination and cooperation, reflected in their exchanges.

"You're an idiot, knew that?" She said, as they waltzed through the stage.

"At least I'm not a pressure pan ready to explode!" He said, tossing her to the side.

"I have my honor!" She returned to his grip.

"You have a temper!" He said, taking her hands.

"You father is a cube!" She said, placing her legs in the middle of his own legs.

"Your mother is a wrench!"

"Don't stay too close to me!" Now, they were at each other's necks.

"Then stay away!"

"The pass needs it! I guess it's the first time you feel a woman's chest against yours!"

"What chest?!"

"You big pervert!"

"If you want, I can just go away!"

"I didn't tell you to go away!"

"Now, it's you who's pressing!"

"And this makes you the pervert!"

Len dipped the woman over, leaning his body against hers to support each other. With her back curved, Neru makes a face of surprise as she holds tightly onto her partner. At that moment, the music stopped.

"You know, you're not half-bad." Len whispered to her.

"You don't have the guts to win prize." Neru replied. "Wanna go somewhere after this?"

"It'd be an honor."

The crowd, which remained in respectful silence during the presentation, cheered loudly. Len and Neru stood still and looked each other. They blushed and averted each other's gaze, but they didn't let go of their hands. It needed Ruko to step down and lift their hands into the air. There was no doubt that they both deserved the prize.

They would receive the prize if Cubi didn't stealthily snatched the prize, ordering Hio to mush the cart. But then, Ritsu noticed the annoying cube and shot a missile at him, which unfortunately destroyed the prize and also hitting Hio (his life sucked, but this was already old news). But the prize didn't matter for Len and Neru because they gained something greater than this that day.


End file.
